Marathon/Holiday Recap

Goodness!

The last few weeks have flown by so quickly. Full of final exams and the stomach bug and a Turkey focused holiday!

I must have started and stopped this entry a dozen times. Here I am, ready to finish it and get some updates going.

 

First, the half marathon. Wow. I can’t believe that was almost a month ago! The race day was beautiful, the crowds were absolutely amazing, and I ran with some of the best girls around.

The week before the half I was in a bit of a panic, had to take two trips to the doctor for knee pain and then for dizzy spells. Luckily everything was okay and I was cleared to race.

The course was awesome and I’d like to run it again. We ran through center city Philadelphia, through Fairmount Park, and University City. The only pain was the hill in the park between miles 9 and 10. That definitely took a lot out of me.

Throughout my entire race prep I had thought I had my race nutrition down and that I would be good to go. Before and during the race everything was going fine, but after. Oh, after. That was not as planned. My body was pretty freaked out by what it had just done, I guess, but I couldn’t keep any food down for most of the day (and a few days after). I got lucky though, my appetite was back and voracious in time for Thanksgiving dinner J

In a spurt of what may have been insanity, I also signed up for a 5k Thanksgiving morning in my hometown. It was MUCH colder than it had been 4 days earlier at the half, but I was ready. I had just run 13 miles, what was another 3? I forgot that there was not 1 but 3 good sized inclines on this course and I was regretting my decision to run about half way through, but I pushed on. I was focused on getting as close to 30 mins or less as I could! That was my biggest goal. I had run (“walked”) that 5k my junior year of high school in 39 minutes so running it in under 30mins 10 years later was my dream.  My clock time was 30:36, which was not quite under, but it was 20 seconds faster than my last 5k, so it was still a personal best! Plus my dad and boyfriend were at the start/finish line cheering me on, and my mom was at the halfway/turnaround! It was a really great day!

Since then I have not been running any great distances, just a few miles here and there. Plus with the stomach bug last week I wasn’t working out at all!

I’m back on the spin train, hitting class as many times a week as I can. I have my last weigh-in with Carly tomorrow before the Holidays. I’m hoping for in the 180’s! It would be a holiday miracle! I’ll be spending the holidays partly in Michigan with my boyfriend and his family, so I’m working on some workouts to take with me, plus they have a wonderful dog that I can take on nice long walks!

I’ll try and update again soon, thanks for taking the time to stop by!



So the day finally came. The Philadelphia Half Marathon! After weeks and weeks of training, the big day was finally here.

 

I'm working on a post about my race nutrition and my thoughts on the race itself. For now, let me just say I FINISHED! Until I can get the other post up, enjoy this photo of me and my run buddies after the finish. 

 

Half Marathon Finishers!!

 



Looking in the Mirror

This is a pretty emotionally heavy entry. I’ve had a rough week and it is going to be a somewhat negative emotional dumping ground here today.

The half marathon is just over a week away! I can’t believe it is already here. And yet, I also can’t wait for it to be over! This has been such a physical and emotional journey.

Today what I want to write about is the mental struggle of losing weight. The literature says that losing weight is 80% diet and 20% exercise. It is also 99% mental. If your head and heart aren’t in it, then things aren’t likely to change (or last).

This is an area that I still struggle with daily. I self-sabotage. I dream of taking the easy way out and getting a lap band or surgery or trying new diet pills or whatever the heck Sensa is. But I don’t do it. In the end I feel somewhat like a masochist. I talk down to myself and wonder why I even bother. The next day I’ll wake up and be determined to do it better, to do it right. I load on the guilt. I acknowledge and accept what my weaknesses are as a person. I own them. But they are a heavy burden to bear. I wonder what I could do differently to not feel this way.

The worst is looking in the mirror.                       

I’ve lost nearly 80lbs. That is like a 9 year old child. 80 freaking pounds!!! It doesn’t seem to change that when I look in the mirror, I see a girl who still weighs 270 pounds. I don’t see the changes. I buy clothes 6 pants sizes smaller. I wear a Medium instead of a double-XL. The mirror though, tells a different story. It is defeating. I don’t see ENOUGH change, I need to work harder. What do I do when that energy isn’t there?

The only answer I can convince myself to believe right now is that I will be okay as long as I take it one day at a time. I tell myself that in May when school is done things will be better. I can go back to a normal work schedule instead of 10 hour days. I’ll have more free time for myself. I wonder, though, if that will really happen. Do I know how to relax? Do I know how to take that pressure off myself? I’m not sure I do.

Keeping the Ball Rolling

Today I am going to re-start the JCore program for a 2nd round. I was really pleased with the results and the last few weeks I have done a few of the videos here and there. I was happy with the order they were in on the calendar, so I figured why mess with a good thing? 

I'm hoping paired with running and spin and my weight training that I will see more pounds and inches fall away. 

I picked up a store-made Halloween costume today. I usually only make mine, but this year I was running way behind schedule and was not happy with any of my ideas. I was so excited because I was able to get the size 12 costume. No more plus sizes for me! :) Small victory Monday!

Time to go Rev It Up!!

Half Marathon Training: Am I crazy??

The Philadelphia Half Marathon is a mere 5 weeks away! By this time on November 18th I will be FINISHED and wearing a medal as a half-marathoner. I still wonder if I am crazy for attempting this...

Training has been going better than I thought it would be. For getting a rough start, I am really happy with where I am so far. 

I hardly ran all summer. A few short 2 or 3 miles here or there, but I really put my energy into swimming and spin for most of the hot months. Yesterday morning I ran 10.52 miles and didn't walk any of it! I took a brief logistics break to talk with one of my girlfriends I was running with to chat about the end of our route, but other than that, I ran the entire time. I am about 30-45 seconds slower than my Broad Street pace from May, but I had to stop and walk 4 or 5 times (or more) during BSR. My goal is to make it through the half without walking. 

My original goal was 2.5 hours, I finished the 10.5 in just a squeak under 2. I am hoping race day adrenaline can push me through to beat that goal time. 

I was planning on following the Women's Health 10 week training guide for Half Marathons. With the passing of Russ' grandma and the start of a new school semester I definitely was not training like I should. The last few weeks have been much better and I've been following the Fitness magazines training guide. Instead of 4 short runs and 1 long run, I've been doing 2 shorter training runs and 2 days of spin and then the long runs on Saturdays.

Map My Run is my new favorite website. I have had a lot of fun tracking out different runs around my neighborhood and down around the Kelly Drive area.  I am hoping next weekend to do somewhere between 11 and 12 miles, the following weekend get as close to full race distance as possible, and then back off to an 8 or 9 miles the week before. 

I am looking in to some possible races to keep me going through the winter months. There is a 14k in February in Virginia Beach. It would give me a chance to visit my brother and the temps down there in February are much more mild than they are here in Philadelphia. 

I'll try and keep my updates coming! Thanks to everyone that has offered me support and said such nice things about me blogging. Appreciated very much!!

78.5

Had a great appointment with my RD Carly today. She has been so helpful and has been a key to why I am finally getting back on track. This summer turned out to be great for my weight loss. I (and my boyfriend) became regulars at a new spin studio, I started working with Carly, and I completed the JCore program. All of these things have been so enjoyable and motivating. 

Best news of all is that it has been 5 weeks since my last appointment with Carly. My last appointment (9/4) I weighed in at 198. It was good, but not great and I was starting to get hung up on the scale again. This last month I have pushed so hard. JCore workouts, running again, spin classes, weight training.... I have been killing it at the gym and equally watching myself in the kitchen. 

Today's scale read 191.5. I cannot even describe to you how exciting that was to see. I have felt like I was losing again, both from looking in the mirror and from the way clothes fit. I have never been at 191 or 192 before. The lowest I have ever gotten was 194 last summer. On my birthday I set a goal of 190 by Halloween and I think I can accomplish that goal. 

The boyfriend and I went to Kohl's on Sunday and I bought 3 new pairs of jeans, all size 12's. It was a great feeling. Thinking back to the pair of 22/24's I wore 3 years ago, I still get pretty shocked at how far I've come. 

Talking with Carly helps a lot. She understands my crazy brain and why I am scared of certain foods (carbs) and how I have a version of an ED through my obsession with exercise. Luckily we've worked out a nutrition plan that I am happy with and can follow with no problems. I don't feel deprived and I'm seeing the results I wanted to see. 

My parents are coming to visit in 11 days and I haven't seen them since July. I am really excited to see what they say and if they can notice a difference. 

Next update: Running a Half Marathon, or, Why I'm driving myself crazy.

JCore Follow Up - 40 days done!

Hi everyone!

So sorry for such a long absence. Sometimes life just happens and it was a very emotional time grieving, sharing, and even laughing. I am truly lucky to have gotten to spend time with my SO's family. They are such caring, wonderful people. I'm going to give my JCore wrap up here and then do another post with other health/fitness related business after. There is so much to catch up on!

Anyway, here I am, 9 days after my Day 40 for JCore! I can't believe it is over already. It went SO FAST. I can't recommend the JCore program enough. 

After 40 days I lost 9lbs and around 6 inches overall (although my final measurements were a little skewed, so I'm going simply by the scale and the photos. 

I plan on continuing JCore for another 40 days because I am so happy with the workouts and the results I have seen. 

Doing something a little outside my comfort zone and I'm going to post my Before and After Photos. My midsection is the bane of my existence. I swear I look like a sharpei. A lot of it is weight left to lose and a lot of it is loose skin from what I've lost so far. I think there is a noticeable difference in the way my sides/are starting to tighten. Also, I've noticed a change in my arms/shoulders. Okay, enough procrastinating. Here we go. Warning: NSFW (sports bra). 

Before and After. My socks are cool. So is my sweat. ;)

Break

Hi Readers,

It is with a sad heart that I post today. My wonderful boyfriend lost his grandmother yesterday and it has been a very long and stressful past few days as her health began to rapidly decline.

He is a mid-western boy so we are in the midst of getting things together here in Philly so that we can travel to Indiana and be with his family for services.

I will be taking a short break from the blog to help him through this, but I'll be back to posting once we return. 

It is day 32 today. Just over a week away from completing the program. I am going to do my best with all of the events coming up to stay on point nutritionally. Also, I'm planning on bringing my JCore DVDs and laptop so that I can still do my workouts in the hotel room. 

Prayers and well wishes are appreciated.

Thanks.

Personal Best

I've been having trouble with my running after taking the whole summer off. Was determined to run for 30 minutes at lunch today without stopping.

Turned out I had one of the best runs I'd had in a while, but also set a personal best for 5k time. Somehow managed to push out 3.1 miles in 30:17!! Just 18 measely seconds off from my desire to be under 30 minutes. Soon!!

Now, if only I could magically add 10 more miles to that with ease! My hope is that a few more weekend runs outside in the cooler weather will help renew my energy and focus. I really am not a huge fan of running, I get so bored. This half marathon is a big goal for me, I'd like to finish it with as much strength and stamina as I can muster.

One step closer!

Yesterday on a whim my SO and I decided to head up to the Outlets to both be outside and shop. It was a beautiful day and while I was open to picking up some things, I wasn't going with any intention in mind. 

Now, throughout all of my weight loss, the GAP outlet has been my friend. Great bargains and quality items makes me very, very happy. I remember the first trip I took there in the summer of 2009 and I bought 2 XL shirts. I was so excited that I could even SHOP in the Gap, that I didn't care what size or style the items were! Okay, well maybe I cared a little. 

Yesterday I was in there, yet again making my way through the 60 and 70% off racks, when I saw the cutest black dress. I grabbed a L to try on, and then at the last minute, I put it back and grabbed the M. The last time I bought clothes, I was able to purchase all M tops, so I was hopeful that I could squeeze into the dress. I also grabbed some jeans and a few tops. Lo and behold the dress looked AMAZING and fit perfectly! I was so excited. As I tried on the jeans, I realized that the 14's were actually a little too loose for comfort. I stood in that dressing room debating to myself if I wanted to try on 12's. I have never been a size 12 (as an adult, anyway). Throughout high school I was a consistent 16 and in college ballooned up to a 22/24. I decided to take the risk and to my shock, amazement, and unbridled joy, the 12's fit. And not in a jump up and down suck it in coat hanger in the zipper fit. They buttoned and zipped with ease. Tears were shed in that dressing room. Tears of pride. 10+ pants sizes lost in 3 years. I earned it. 

I bought the dress, the jeans, and some size Medium tops, with a savings of over $75. It was a great day and a reminder that no matter how often I stress over the scale, or over-analyze what I'm eating (or not eating), that my hard work is paying off.  I still can't set a goal weight, but I know my goal size is in the single digits. I am now one step closer to those single digit sizes that I long to wear.

JCore - Day 24

This week has been a tough one. My legs have been pretty sore and I am trying to add running back in to my routine in addition to spinning regularly plus JCore. The good news is that I, and others, are noticing the results! I've gotten a lot of compliments and questions this week about if I am losing weight again, which is a good sign after all the hurdles I've been trying to get past. I am really excited to see Carly in 12 days and see what the scale says! Also, Monday is the 3rd Fit Test. Pretty excited to see what changes are there as well. 

I've gotten very comfortable with my nutrition plan. I finally feel more balanced with eating. I still have moments where I stress and over analyze everything I eat, but I take more enjoyment out of cooking and enjoying food lately. I am a work in progress. 

This morning I switched things up and did my JCore workout (Rev Up) before work instead of after. This was a 5:30am work out, but I feel like it actually gave me more energy to get through a 10 hour work day. Tomorrow is a rest day and then Saturday and Sunday will be Cardio Core and Hard Core. Bring on the pain!

JCore Days 20, 21, 22 - Over half way!

Halfway done with JCore! I honestly am surprised at how quickly the time is going. Day 20 (Sunday) was Hard Core and I attempted to do less positions in modified. It was so difficult! But I am definitely getting stronger and I am still feeling sore today.

I did do measurements on Day 20 and am pretty happy with the overall results so far. Here's how it looks:

Hips: -4"
Wasit: -2"
Thigh: -1"
Arm: -1"

Total inches lost so far: 8"!

I am SO happy to see the numbers dropping in my hips/waist, since that is the area where I am carrying the bulk of these last 20-30lbs. In 2 weeks I'll go back and see Carly and that will be my next time getting on a scale. Fingers crossed that number drops as well!

Yesterday was an off day from JCore but I went for a run in the morning as a start to my half marathon training. Started off with a 5k, hoping to build back up to a comfortable 5 miler in the next week or so. Just need to get my legs used to the running again. Last spring was definitely the best time I've had with running, hoping to bring that back! I'm still pretty terrified at the idea of running 13 (.1) miles, but I think it will be truly badass to finish that race and enjoy what I accomplished.

Today is going to be a busy workout day, new step class after work and Fire Fit for JCore. Plus I will probably sneak in a quick workout of some sort at lunch because it is such a nice break to go down to the gym and get away from my desk for a bit.

JCore Day 19

This week has been interesting for JCore, the first two work outs were Rev Up and then Fire Fit. This was followed by the rest day, during which I did an upper body strength workout and spin class! Today was Cardio Core 4x4 and tomorrow will be Hard Core. 2 cardio and 2 core this week. No wonder I am sore! I pushed my weights on Thursday and my arms are feeling it today. Not sure how I'm going to hold myself up tomorrow for Hard Core.

Since tomorrow is Day 20 I am going to take some measurements and compare them to Day 1. No scale, though!

Since school has started back up I've been worrying about how to balance work, school, workouts, and life. The JCore workouts are great because they are fast and you feel the pain of your body working hard. Once I add in training for the half marathon, I'll have to play around with my schedule to make sure I can get everything in and still have time to sleep.

Speaking of which, now that I finished my JCore for the day, it is off to the library to get some school work done!

I know I have gained some new readers the last few weeks and I just want to take a minute to say thank you to everyone who has been reading and following along. Please feel free to comment or ask questions! 

Happy Saturday!

JCore - Day 17 // Half Marathon Training

I can't believe I am almost to the halfway mark of the JCore program! It has been going so quickly, which I guess is a good thing! Last night was Rev Up, which is a really good workout. I am torn between that and Fire Fit as my favorites. Which is fitting, since Fire Fit is today's workout! The boyfriend and I are also heading to spin class after I get out of work, so it will be a good calorie burn day. Getting dressed this morning, I definitely am seeing changes in my body, even if the scale isn't reflecting them.

In other news - the Philly Half Marathon is only 73 days away!! I am going to be picking up a more formal training program this weekend and hopefully I will be ready to give it my all. After barely running all summer, I am pretty nervous. I've been easing back in to a few 2 or 3 mile runs to get my legs going again, plus I found a 10 week training guide in Women's Health that I will follow. My goal is to be able to maintain 10:30-11 min miles the whole time. If I could finish in under 2:15:00 I would be ecstatic. One day at a time.

Irony

I am not sure if there will ever be a time where I am not worried about what the scale says. I have tried so hard over the last few months to break that addiction and to focus on how good I feel and how much better (and how many sizes smaller) clothes fit. That number, though. That blasted number.

I was up 1lb yesterday at my check in with Carly. I was upset, she wasn’t. I should be relieved that after 3 days away and eating out that it was only a 1lb difference (which could just be fluid) but I felt defeated. When you work hard and put every spare ounce of energy you have towards a goal, not meeting that goal is disappointing. No matter which way you dice it.

The funniest part is that 3 weeks ago at my last appointment with Carly, I was convinced I was up and had ranted and raved at her for a half hour about how I work hard and am upset about being up, but when I got on the scale I was down 6lbs. Yesterday I felt really good, my clothes were fitting looser, I felt more toned and almost “thin”, and then the number was up. I know I am not alone with these frustrations.

The good news is that it is already Wednesday. The workweek is almost over, the first week back to school has started, and half marathon training starts soon.

Check back in later for a JCore update!

JCore Day 14 - Fit Test!

Well, I've been back home from NYC for less than an hour and I have jumped back on to my JCore routine with both feet. Fit Test and Release done! After walking 8-10 miles the last 3 days, my body was feeling sore and I wasn't sure I could handle the Fit Test. I decided to do Release since I missed it yesterday for Day 13. I did eat cheese while in NYC but healthy choices at meals and packing our own healthy snacks made the trip much smoother than it could have gone. 

Here are the results from my first 3 Fit Tests - Day 1, Day 7, and Day 14.

Day 1
Popsicle (L) - 24 (modified)
Popsicle (R) - 13
Leaning Tower (L) - 21 (modified)
Leaning Tower (R) - 22 (modified)
Charlies Angels (L)- 30
Charlies Angels (R) - 34
Break Dance- 10 (took me a while to figure out how to do them)
Pick Me Up - 14 (modified)
Threading the Needle- 32
Get Up - 10

Day 7 (nothing modified!)
Popsicle (L) -21
Popsicle (R) -23
Leaning Tower (L) - 28 
Leaning Tower (R) - 26
Charlies Angels (L)- 38
Charlies Angels (R) - 36
Break Dance- 28
Pick Me Up - 13 
Threading the Needle- 48
Get Up -9

Day 14 (nothing modified!)
Popsicle (L) -26
Popsicle (R) -26
Leaning Tower (L) - 28 
Leaning Tower (R) - 30
Charlies Angels (L)-42
Charlies Angels (R) -42
Break Dance-40
Pick Me Up - 19
Threading the Needle-58
Get Up -13

The numbers are definitely showing an improvement in my flexibility and strength. I have terrible, terrible, balance and the fact that I can now do both the Popsicle and Leaning Towers unmodified is darn impressive. 

I'm hoping to have my SO take some pictures of me or maybe even video of some of the workouts to document my progress. I'm really surprised and happy with the improvements and toning I'm feeling after only two weeks on this program. Tomorrow is an off day and I'm excited for the day of rest. I am meeting with Carly my RD tomorrow for my check-in/weigh-in so we will see how much of a change the scale reflects. Cross your virtual fingers for a drop!

JCore - Day 12

Well, this morning I did 2 of the JCore DVD's back to back. What a challenge that was!! My shoulders are on FIRE! I decided to bump things up today since my boyfriend and I are heading up to NYC for the weekend. 

I am hoping to follow the nutrition program as closely as possible. In preparation for the train ride and hotel stay we have packed up healthy snacks like rice cakes, to-go packs of low salt mixed nuts, and some fruit. I'm hoping having these snacks on hand will make stop any urges to snack on junk. I am going to really give it my all to stick to the no bread and no cheese since I am still in period 2, but I make no promises. I have gotten so much better in the last few months after working with Carly at making good choices when eating out, I think I can get through this trip without too much temptation.

I am going to be doing a LOT of walking while in NYC and will pick up with JCore on Monday when we get back, it will be day 14 - Fit Test time!

JCore - Update

Sorry for the MIA-ness the last few days. Came down with a terrible stomach bug and just didn't have the energy to post!

The last few days of JCore have been going really well. Getting dressed this morning I feel like I am starting to see some shrinkage in the waist and hip area - YAY!

The Fire Fit may be my favorite DVD so far- good moves and it is tough. I love it. The 20 minutes goes by so quickly by the time I feel like I am about to fall over, theres only the cool down left.

Hard Core was the hardest workout of the set (so far) and I am hoping more days of that will have me getting a stronger and smaller middle.

Cutting out bread and cheese for this period is going to be the hardest. I can get by without bread if I must, but cheese, oh man. This will be difficult, but what can't you do for just 10 days?

Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend everyone. The boyfriend and I will be heading to NYC for a lot of sunshine and walking!

JCore Days 7 and 8

Yesterday was the 1 week mark of the JCore program. With that day came the first fit test! On Day 1 there was a 10 minute fit test that will be repeated 4 times during the program: Day 7, Day 14, Day 28 and then the Final Exam on the last day! 

So I grabbed my notepad and pen and began the fit test. There are 10 exercises that you do for 60 seconds, the goal being to increase the number of reps on each subsequent test. For the 10 exercises I was up in rep count on 7 out of 10. For the other 3 I was down by 1 rep, 1 rep and 3 reps. However, the ones where I was down in count, I had done in proper form instead of modified form. I count that as an improvement, even if the number is down. 

Day 8 is an off day, but I'll head to spin class tonight to get a decent workout. Next Tuesday is my next appointment with Carly. I'm excited to see what the scale says, even though I'm trying not to get hung up on the number, of course!

JCore Day 6

Today is the day I was dreading the most on this program. The first Saturday. Weekends have always been my downfall. The work week is so easy to plan, pack and stay on point with nutrition, and even though I'm good about weekend workouts, there is something about Saturdays that makes me just want to throw calories and portions out the window. A big part of the mental hurdle of doing JCore and following Carly's plan is me focusing my energies and willpower on not going crazy and thinking about the end goal. How can I make smarter decisions while out but still feel like I can relax and have fun?

At the gym this morning I did the same upper body workout from last Saturday, and after I get home from work this afternoon I will do the assigned JCore DVD, I didn't check my calendar but I think it is the Cardio Core 4x4 again.

I know it is too early to see results, but I did have someone say to me yesterday that I was looking more toned. I'm hoping that the combination of following Carly's plan, switching up my workouts, and now adding JCore is going get me through this homestretch.

JCore Day 5

Yesterday was the non-workout day of JCore, which worked out in the long run since I had a lot of errands to run after work, including spending over an hour waiting at the DMV to get a new photo for my license, as I noted in my last post. :) After the DMV trip the SO and I went to Ikea and loaded up on boxes for our new entertainment center. Lugging all the shelf pieces, drawers, and other miscellaneous boxes from the parking garage to the apartment was my weight lifting workout for the day, that's for sure!

The rest of the evening was spent moving furniture and assembling the new pieces. While not a traditional "workout" I was certainly gross and sweaty by the end of the night! Today is day 5 and the workout DVD for this evening is Rev Up, the same one from Day 2. When walking around Ikea yesterday I noticed some soreness in my obliques and I think it is from the Cardio Core 4x4 workout! I don't think we add any new DVD's until the next 10 day period, but I'm excited to see how sore I get and if I start to see any changes or results.

Renewed

I had to go and renew my drivers license today. After an hour and 15 minutes waiting in line, I held in my hand a new identification card. Comparing the photo on my old license to the new, I realized that not only was I now a legal driver again, but I was a renewed person. No longer am I held back (as much) by my insecurity and self-consciousness. It is drastically reduced from the crippling fear I once felt. Looking at these two pictures, I feel happy with myself and proud of what I have accomplished and continue to accomplish.

JCore Day 4

Here I am, 1/10 of the way through the JCore program. While I am not following the nutrition plan to the letter, I am glad that this program and my dietitan have given me the same advice. I know that I could easily drop the last 20-30lbs I want to lose by cutting out all carbs and sugar. But I also know that I would gain that all back as soon as I tried to reintroduce those foods. Plus, I would feel deprived. I'd rather lose this last bit slowly, doing it the right way and eating things I enjoy, than making myself miserable.

Last night the workout was the Cardio Core 4x4 and it was tough! I love that the workouts are 20 minutes and it feels like a FAST 20 minutes. It was a tough workout, mostly floor exercises that focus on tightening the core while working arms and legs.

Today is an off day for workouts and I'm leaving work early today to go get my drivers license renewed (Yay! DMV lines!) But I may do a small workout when I get home, like a kinect workout game, just so I get some movement in today.

JCore - Day 3

Well, I have to say that yesterday went better than I anticipated. Was able to hold out all day without any artificial sweeteners. No coffee and no diet soda. :) Although today I think I am going to attempt coffee with just a teeny bit of milk. Considering I didn't start drinking coffee on the regular until a few months ago, this is a big change for me. I've been trying the peppermint herbal tea but the lack of caffeine is what I'm missing most. Otherwise the nutrition plan with JCore hasn't been hard to follow, since it is so similar to what I've already been doing.

I did a "before" photo along with measurements and a weigh-in yesterday. It will be interesting to see what the difference is in 37 more days! I did the first workout yesterday, Rev Up, which was the fastest 20 minute workout I've done! It was very fast paced and with only 30 seconds per exercise, you need to focus and push hard. My legs were definitely sore afterwards and I was plenty sweaty.

It just so happened that my SO and I were signed up for a spin class last night, so I toweled off from JCore, got changed into my bike pants and headed off to class. I think it made for a good combined workout. With JCore you are encouraged to do other activities and exercises on the days where no JCore workout is assigned, which is nice for me to keep spinning, running, and swimming in my schedule.
Tonights workout I think is the Cardio 4x4 so I'm excited to see what that is like.

JCore - Day 2

I guess this is an incorrect and misleading title, since I am going to recap day 1 and not get into day 2 yet. Oh, well.

So, day 1 was pretty easy. Didn't change too much from my usual routine. The plan was to cut out artificial sweeteners but I did have a diet soda. Ugh. But I am going to really put full 100% effort in from now on to avoid it. After drinking so much water all day, I just really wanted that diet dr. pepper!

There was no official workout for Day 1, just a fitness test. It was 10 1-minute exercises, pretty basic. You are supposed to write down your number of reps for each exercise and then beat that number on each subsequent fitness test. There will be 2 during the 40 days and then a "final exam" on the last day. Hoping I can really boost my numbers by the end!

Day 2 has the first DVD work out, Rev Up, which I will be doing later this evening. My boyfriend and I have been taking spin classes on Tuesday so I'm hoping it won't be too much to do this 20 minute workout before spin class.

The plan for today is for my friend and co-worker who is also doing this program and I to do "before" photos and take some initial measurements. It will be nice to have those numbers to compare to the end results.

Armed with lemon water and peppermint herbal tea, I'm hoping my willpower hangs in there today.

JCore - Day 1

Against my better judgement I let a good friend talk me into trying a fitness/diet plan for 40 days. It is the JCORE plan and since my friend knows someone who successfully completed the program and is featured as a "Success Story" I was even more interested. Things have been going well with Carly, my RD, and I really don't want to mess with a good thing. But I ordered the program anyway and was relieved to find that besides a few minor tweaks, the JCore program and my program from Carly are almost identical. Both diets focus on a goal calorie range for your goal weight, and then creating a balanced diet using an exchange system. It is a balanced plan including protein, carbs, fats, fruits, and veggies.

The biggest differences in JCore from what I'm currently doing are 1) cutting out ALL processed foods, artificial sweeteners, added sugars and alcohol. 2) Removing bread and cheese from 10 days of the 40 to see how sensitive your body can be to those items and 3) Having slightly larger portions of protein. I've decided not to mess with Carly's numbers and exchanges so I will not be following #3 for JCore, but I will attempt numbers 1 and 2. I think finally trying to wean myself off of diet soda may be a good thing in the long run (though I'm not sure on my willpower to actually stop). Removing bread and cheese for 10 days isn't terrible, and you are free to add them back in after the 10 days are up. Diets in Review did a pretty decent review of the JCore diet plan.

Fitness wise the plan comes with 5 DVDs and the program calls for 4-20 minute workouts a week. The program comes with a calendar and shows you how to rotate the DVDs. The other 3 days of the week are open for "Optional Exercise" or adding in another JCore DVD. This will work well with my current fitness routine and 20 minutes a day is doable even with my crazy schedule.There is also a fitness test DVD which you do a few times over the 40 day period to track progress.

Today is Day 1 for me, so after I get home this afternoon I will do the Intro/Fitness Test DVD and get this ball rolling. Let's just see how I do this morning without a coffee with splenda or a diet cherry pepsi to get me through! Tomorrow I will update with a "Before" picture and some stats so we can see how much can really change in 40 days.

Saturday Morning Upper Body Workout

Warm Up: 1 mile run: .5mi easy, .25 hard, .25 sprint

Complete each exercise for 30 secs, complete each circuit 3 times.

Circuit 1:

- Tight grip/Tricep push-up

- Wide grip/ Chest push-up

- Down dog/ Shoulder push-up

- Mountain Climbers

- 1 minute jump rope-

Circuit 2:

- Single arm kettlebell or dumbbell swing - Right

- Single arm kettlebell or dumbbell swing - Left

- Bicep curls

- Bicep curls with overhead press

- 1 minute jump rope- 

Circuit 3:

- Tricep dips

- Overhead tricep extension

- Single arm tricep row - Right

- Single arm tricep row - Left

- 1 minute jump rope-

Circuit 4:

- Dumbbell pull-over

- Chest flies

- Chest press

-Wide grip/ Chest push-up

- 1 minute jump rope-

Warm-down: Rowing machine

The couple that works out together....

The past few weeks have been exciting since my SO has decided to get on the health kick with me and start watching portions and thinking more about what and when and how to eat. I'm certain he is already seeing results and I'm so happy and proud of him. Plus, he's much less OCD than me, so he does not seem to have the constant stress and anxiety that I have.

Tonight we are taking a spin class together, which is VERY exciting. I have taken spin classes before, but this will be his first. I'm excited not only for him to try something new and to push himself further than he has before, but also because it is something that (if he enjoys) that we can do together.

After all of this Olympics coverage I got back in the pool this past weekend. I love swimming and have not done it for a long time. Saturday morning I hit the pool and swam laps, walked laps and tried to do as much movement as possible. After the hour was up I didn't feel like I had really gotten much of a workout in, but by the time I got to work an hour later, my body was SO sore. I am hoping to hit the pool on weekends for the rest of the summer since running outside in this humidity is impossible for me.

My birthday is coming up soon and I am hoping to make good choices this week and through the weekend since I am meeting with Carly the RD next week for my monthly weigh in!

A Fresh Start?

Here I am again, rebooting this baby for the 3^rd time. Maybe I will actually be able to commit and get this to become a regular occurrence instead of a temporary enjoyment! Life just seems to always get in the way of the things I would rather be doing. Like writing here!

Since my last post things have been, interesting, to say the least.

Finished my first year of grad school, still working full time, and still battling those last 30 or so pounds.

Since my 25^th birthday in 2010, the only loss I have seen was a few pounds, which came right back. I’ve been holding steady at 201-205, which is pretty disappointing. I would love to be back under 200. The only positive is that I seem to at least be shifting the weight around, because I am fitting in mostly size 12 clothes, or size Medium. Which is a definite change from the last time I was in this weight range.

I started working with a registered dietician, Carly, who is awesome! My last post I had met with a nutritionist who I stopped seeing. His approach was coming from a good place but it was just not a good fit. Working with Carly, I switched from calorie counting to an exchange program about 6 weeks ago. Diet seems to be where the problems are, since my workouts continue to be strong, varied, and intense! Hopefully with some patience and tweaking we can figure out where the disconnect is as to why I haven’t been dropping pounds.

With a full time job, a boyfriend, two cats and grad school, there are still days where I just want to stop caring so much about what the scale says, what I eat, and what workouts I do. But after coming this far, I just can’t bring myself to stop yet. I know I can reach that end goal.

For now I will promise this, a stronger commitment to this blog and more regular updates. Third times the charm right?

Fresh Eyes, Fresh Perspective

 So on Monday I met with a nutritionist. I have not really seen much progress besides maintenance over the last year. I wanted a fresh look at what I was doing, what I could do better, and how I could get closer to my “end goal” weight.

The funny thing is, after many discussions with friends, I’m not sure what that goal weight is anymore. I had a number in mind, but I wonder if it is realistic for my body? Having never in my adult life weighed less than I do right now, I don’t have any idea what the right number really is for me, or what is realistic to work towards. What I do know is that I am going to work hard until my body lets me know that I have reached a healthy, maintainable weight that I am aesthetically pleased with.

The nutritionist was impressed with my food journal and he did not suggest doing anything drastic like cutting out a whole food group or only eating a particular food. I had nightmares leading up to the appointment that he was going to tell me to cut out carbs forever!

His biggest piece of advice, which I have heard from others numerous times, is that I don’t eat enough. We talked about my routine and what I eat and what workouts I do and when. He had some computer programs that we could plug the information in to and he was pretty adamant that I should be eating about 300-400 calories more per day. The best part though, was that he’d like to see me eat MORE carbs! He also suggested a supplement shake to take as a snack. While I don’t usually like to do those meal replacement shakes or snacks, this is a medical food, lots of vitamins and nutrients to help keep things going. I haven’t done a TON of research on it, but I was willing to give it a shot. It’s called UltraMeal 360 Plus. It’s not too chalky and tastes kind of like Nesquik. The first day I did it with water and it was alright, but it is MUCH better with unsweetened almond milk.

So I am now working on 2000 calories a day, keeping my workout schedule the same 6 days a week and I go back in 2 weeks for a check in to see how things are going. I’m not expecting to start dropping 10lbs a week or anything, but hopefully after a couple weeks (months) of making changes and checking in with the nutritionist, I will finally start to see some new progress.

Eating more isn’t easy for me, it still takes a lot of time and work, but I am finding myself already more relaxed without having to worry about whether or not I’ll eat TOO much.

Right now, only time (and my pants) will tell.

1 month scale free!

Too bad I am having trouble being excited about it right now. I can't believe that its been a month since I last stepped on a scale. In some ways I am proud and happy that I have somehow managed to break the chain that was holding me on to the number. Another part of me is terrified to get back on it again for fear of what I might see.

So I gave up the scale for lent. That will continue this scale-free lifestyle of mine into April. In place of the scale, I have been taking tape measurements of waist, hip, neck, arm, thigh and calf on the 1st of the month, starting in February. Yesterday was the 1st, so I went down to see what the tape measure said. With not weighing myself at all, I have had to rely on how my body feels and how my clothes fit for an idea of how I was doing. My jeans were loose, tops that had been too tight before were fitting again, I was sure that the numbers would show some progress.

Not one number changed.

My measurements were exactly the same from a month ago.

I honestly cannot put into words how heartbreaking that was to see.

I weigh and measure my food. I keep a detailed food journal tracking everything I put in my mouth. Including macro nutrients! I have spreadsheets and journals and sticky notes galore! I go to the gym 7 days a week and track my heart rate and calories burned.

WHY AM I STUCK?!?!

What to do?

 I had a super negative post ready for last week. It was a bad week. Emotionally, eating wise, workouts, nothing was going according to plan. My stress level was through the roof.

And I was unable to get logged in to post that entry. I took it as a sign to put the negativity away, move on, and keep going.

I haven't seen a scale in weeks. It still lingers in the back of my mind. But it has gotten easier. I focus on how my clothes fit and how I feel.

I am meeting with a nutritionist on Monday. I'm nervous and excited.

The math is that if you eat less than you need, you lose weight. I do that consistently, but there seems to be no change (going from my weigh every day numbers). I worry that I will have to give up the carbs I love oh so much (even though I restrict them already), or that there is something chemically wrong with me. My biggest fear by far, however, is that this man who I have never met will look at my food journal, look at me, and call me a liar. That if this is truly what I eat, and how I workout, then I should not be XXX pounds.

In other news I am doing a 5 mile run in just over a week. And Broad Street (10 miles) is in 2 months. I am hoping that my training this year will actually pay off.

I'm also making it a priority to try and get to some Bikram classes again. I think the sweat and the stretch will do me good.

It is hard to get up every day and weigh and measure all my food, plan out every bite, and manage every detail. Especially with the thought that it is all for naught, that the scale won't move. It makes me mad, frustrated, sad, and ready to give up. But I haven't, I will continue to fight for another week.

Surviving Superbowl Sunday

So I have done pretty well the last few days without my scale. I still daydream about weighing myself. But in the long run I think this is the best thing for my sanity. The past few days have been actually relaxing, we've gone out to eat and I make healthy choices, knowing I deserve something nice and to not be deprived constantly. 

Today, however, is Superbowl Sunday.  And the team that I love with all my heart, the New England Patriots, are playing. Today I will still go to the gym, but I am going to relax and enjoy the game without obsessing about calories. I have a fun menu planned of some "healthy" game day alternatives (Shh, don't tell my boyfriend) and I am making things that are pre-portioned to help prevent over eating. I am excited for a fun and relatively guilt-free Sunday! 

Let's just hope the Pats bring home the win! :)

Once the week gets started I'm sure that I may start wishing I had a scale again, although I hope the more time that goes by the more I will grow less attached. I'll be weighing in again on March 1st. Which is not too terribly far away. I have so many fun things going on between now and then, I'm hoping it will just be here before I know it. 

My knee is feeling better after some pain in the middle of last week. I had a good run on Saturday morning and I really feel like doing more strength training is really helping. I'm noticing more definition in my arms and shoulders, which is a nice thing to see! 

Motivation and Project no-scale day 5

So I made it through the weekend. I made a conscious effort to focus on being happy and healthy and not worrying about the scale. Granted, Friday night I tried to get on a scale at Ikea in the bathroom section and my boyfriend rammed me with a shopping cart to stop me. He's the best.

Yesterday started a new week and I won't lie, I really wanted my scale again. I wanted to know what "damage" I did over the weekend and how hard I would have to push myself this week to make up for it. It is a weird feeling to not know. I feel like I've lost, for no other reason than my clothes seem to be fitting better. Maybe it is all mental? Honestly, I can't wait for Thursday to weigh in. Can't come soon enough.

In other news, I found this idea on Pinterest and thought it would be a nice change from obsessing over the scale. In the jar on the right are 50 pebbles. Each pebble represents 1lb. I used my last weigh-in from last week to decide how many stones to put in the jar. After my weigh in Thursday I will either move stones over to the "PoundsLost" jar (*crosses fingers*) or add more stones to the "Pounds To Go" jar. I'm hoping it will be a fun and motivational way to watch these last 50 lbs come off.

Breaking the Chain - Day 2

I have never felt so totally lost. Which is both surprising and scary. Waking up this morning and not having a scale to step on was terrible. All I could think about is what that number would have been if I had had a scale to step on, which, I know, is exactly the reason why I DON'T have one right now.

What I can hope for is that today and maybe tomorrow will be awful but then the feeling will ease. As bad as I feel right now, my hope is that by this time next week I won't need to get on a scale every day or analyze the number to death.

1 morning down, 6 to go.

Breaking the Chain

So I missed a little time since my last update, but I promised to stick with this blog, so here we go.

My struggles with my weight and the similar struggles with food have always been difficult. I don’t really ever remember a time where I wasn’t concerned about what I was eating or what I weighed (or what I looked like to others).

Over the last 2 years as I threw myself fully into a quest for health and weight loss, I came to learn so much about nutrition, fitness, and myself. I KNOW the right things to eat, I KNOW the right things to do, or at least I do in theory.

The last 6 months have been incredibly difficult. I have lost, regained and struggled over the same 10 pounds. It is a cycle that I cannot seem to break. It is infuriating to me that I am still in this pattern.

I developed a habit, after I began this journey, of weighing myself every morning, no matter what. I felt in control this way. I turned to the scale for validation. In my mind, I justified this by thinking that it would be easier to track overall weekly averages than just 1 weekly weigh in. My obsessive compulsive, anal-neurotic tendencies took over.

Today is Thursday Jan. 26^th, 2012. This morning I turned over my scale to a trusted friend. I will not weigh myself for the next 7 days.

I began to notice that even if I had a great day of healthy eating and awesome workouts, if the number on the scale the next morning was not what I wanted to see, I would let it ruin my mood, my motivation and I would be ready to quit. So, in an effort to break the chain holding me to my scale, it was surrendered for the greater good. I am going to take the next 7 days to focus on healthy eating, healthy moving, and a healthy mind.

Sometimes I become so focused on where I want to be, that I forget how far I have come. I get bogged down in tiny numbers week to week, losing sight of the big picture. I am more than halfway to my goal and I tend to brush that off as not important enough since I’m not at my goal yet.

It will be a challenge to go without that daily number to tell me how I’m doing. What I hope to learn and find is that I determine how I am doing and how I feel, not the scale. I am not a number on the scale and the number on the scale is not who I am.

The week 2 slump

I haven’t seen any movement on the scale since my weigh-in Saturday. I was starting to get a little disappointed after such a great week last week, until a thought occurred to me. It’s the week 2 slump. I used to LOVE watching the Biggest Loser on NBC. And every season contestants would have HUGE losses the first week at the Ranch, but without fail every season, week 2 would bring little to no results, sometimes even a gain! It was something they began to highlight in each season. How could they get past that week 2 slump?

What helped ease my disappointment today was thinking about how far those contestants went after that week 2 slump. I don’t necessarily agree with how the Biggest Loser gets people to lose the weight, but it seems to fit my situation now. I am hopeful that after this week the scale will catch up with me and I’ll begin seeing a drop again.

This week is going well, still trying to keep my veggie and protein intake high, but I’ve started making smoothies for breakfast as a switch from my weeks of egg whites I was doing previously. Protein powder, greek yogurt, almond milk and some frozen berries make for a great breakfast! But the cravings for carbs are still a daily struggle. I find myself daydreaming about bagels, bread, toast, and rolls. I am trying to limit my carb intake until I start seeing more progress on the scale, but that temptation is high. I wish they didn’t taste so good.

When I was living in Minnesota I tried the Carb Addicts diet. This program restricts the amount of carbs you eat during the day, except for one 60-minute meal when you can eat as many carbs as you want. I lost 17lbs on that, but looking back I was only consuming about 800 calories a day. Today I know that is nowhere near enough. I’ve been thinking about this in comparison to the slow-carb and 4 hour body diet programs that include a cheat day to spike metabolism. I may do some more research into how to make the Carb Addicts diet fit my caloric needs (more veggies and protein?) and then I would still be able to indulge in a carb frenzy for a glorious 60-minutes a day. This is worth the time to at least investigate.  

I am looking forward to weighing in again on Saturday; fingers are crossed for at least a 1lb drop to keep on target for my August goal.

Taken from my favorite subreddit, “LoseIt” comes this week’s mantra:

"Do not let discouragement block your view of your success”

The Goal

So after doing the Women's Health "Look Better Naked" 2 day cleanse, followed by 1 day of a modified cleanse (I added in dairy and nuts), I am down 7lbs! This was just the kick start I needed to start my new year off right.

The SO and I are joining the community center this afternoon. I can't wait to start working out in a new environment! I love the gym at work. The convenience is unbeatable. But a new gym will be a fresh start I think I need.

This morning I weighed in at 206lbs. There are 33 weeks until my birthday. My goal is going to be to lose at least 1lb a week between now and then, though I'll still aim for 1.5. This will put me very, very close to my original goal weight of 160.

I think even though I gained a bit in my "sabbatical" period, I am glad I took that mental break. I am more motivated now than I have been in a while. I am ready to finally shed the last of the weight that has been controlling my life for too long.

Game on!

New Year, New Commitments

It is hard to believe that it is 2012. I feel like just yesterday I was packing my car and moving to Philadelphia to start my adult life. A new city, a new job, living on my own, it was truly a fresh start. When I moved to Philadelphia in March 2009, I weighed 265 pounds. By August 2010, I was down to 199. It has been a tough road, but one I am committed to staying on, no matter how rough it gets. As this New Year begins instead of setting wild or unrealistic goals, my resolution is to commit to this blog. To post something at least once a week, no matter how crazy my schedule gets.

Since moving to Philly, I have taken on my weight and health issues, met and recently moved in with the love of my life, went back to school, and continue to work a full time job. It has been nearly 3 years of wonderful new experiences, along with some sad and troubling times. When I stepped on the scale on New Years Eve, I was 212lbs. This was a gain of 21 pounds from my lowest weight. Of course this was not what I wanted to see, no one likes to see the numbers moving back up. Instead of getting upset, I tried to be positive. In the last 6 weeks I was hit with a lot of stress and of course there were the holidays. I was also taking a sabbatical from the gym to prevent burn out. I’ve lost 75 pounds. As much as losing this same 21 will suck, I can do it.

In addition to getting back into the gym at work, my boyfriend and I will be joining the local Salvation Army community center. It is new and has state of the art equipment, a pool, and group classes. A change of environment and scenery will hopefully add to my motivation.

I’ll be signing up for the Broad Street 10 mile run again this year, so I am preparing to start my training now. No waiting. My only other resolution for 2012 would be to beat my time from last year.

So here’s to a happy, healthy, and wonderful 2012!